Today was the anniversary of my mothers passing

I cleaned this morning... then went to lunch with a friend had 4 rum and cokes.. felt much better came home napped and just woke up. 

It is interesting today of all days I was at peace with my mom.  I thought a great deal about her, and felt amazingly calm.  I miss her, and my father, however the times I had with them were the best times of my life.  I love them both so much.

I told my sister a little bit of my plans today, so she would not be shocked.. when this all occurs.. She was not happy, but was nice about it.

I love my family... but you cant do things for others.. and make choices for others.....it just doesnt work that way.  She is just going to have to understand.

My brother doesnt know..and I doubt he cares to know.. I rarely hear from him.. and his new family is more important than the rest of us.  He doesnt like my illnesses.. and he doesnt like dealing with it.. so.... there is really no point in discussing it with him.

I think he loves me.. but I think I am more bother than I am worth.